Yum, Chemicals!

As much as I have disliked many smells during the first three maxed-out morning sickness months (and still to this day, things like onion breath makes me want to hurl), it’s strange the new aromas which are -in my few weeks- starting to register as pleasant. This is especially perplexing as most of the scents are those typically classified as the unhealthy, chemical variety. Gasoline, for example. I feel like a kid again; who likes to take a few big whiffs while pumping up at the tank. The car exhaust emanating from my boyfriend’s old 4Runner -the same exhaust I was obsessively complaining about in the early stages of pregnancy- smells absolutely yummy. And while driving on newly tarred roads I can’t help but stick my head out the window to inhale it deeply. I have no idea what this is about, but similar to strange food cravings, I’ll assume this is actually my unborn son’s desires that I am inadvertently fulfilling. In the meantime, trips to Home Depot and walks down the cleaning fluid, paints, and treated wood isles are, for now, something I not only don’t mind, but absolutely enjoy.

What the F?!?

Most everyone I know sleeps with their baby in the bed but, despite the King Size of ours, I’m kinda scared about the abuse the baby may receive. Dad can be down for 9-10 hours in a row and have the most efficient, lovely beauty sleeps – but as for what mom may feel lying next to him….that’s another story.

First, he talks in his sleep. Enough to wake you up and perk up your ears for interesting details…but it’s mostly inanities and a few lines here and there that give no real-world clues or insights. Next, he’s a blanket stealer. If I get to cover half of my body vertically with just the sheet I consider it lucky. And indeed, lucky we live Hawaii or I’d be freezing my tokhes (tush) off.

This morning though he stole my pillow – that was the last straw! He already has two of his own mind you, but he stole my king sized, which is the closest thing I have to a body pillow – and is absolutely required for any decent maternity rest in these final weeks. I awoke, panicked, looking for it, and there he was nuzzled in a big ball of sheet, blanket and pillows – as if he was pregnant. I slid my big pillow out from under him, so I could try to fall back asleep (if writing this at 4 am is any sign of how well that worked out), and his response was to yell “What the F*ck!”. Yes, sir, what the F*CK already!

I haven’t even touched on the elbow to the face move which unbelievably has not yet produced a black eye but obviously the baby will have to sleep on the outside of me where I can better protect him. Now if we could only afford a co-sleeper so I could really keep him safe.

p.s. I finally went back for a couple xtra hours of sleep early AM and awoke to a very realistic dream – where I was massaging my guy’s legs and feet because they were sore! Can you imagine? I’ve gotten one foot rub every month or two during this pregnancy (that usually lasts a distracted minute — and yes, gets filed under the ‘why bother’ category) and here I am, working my arse off in my sleep rubbing him because HE is sore! Oy vey!!!!

Crying, Laughing, Crying

All those innocent little hormones that fill the body and mind of the pregnant momma make us seem psychotic (just do a Google search for “crazy” + “pregnant” = endless list). And while this is occurring, the worst thing for us to hear from others is that we are crazy. It’s overwhelming news to us (though surely something we are subconsciously pondering), filling us with an irrational fear that this quite possibly is a permanent state of being…which can cause us to feel even more unstable because we have no sense of control. It’s much more kind for the people in our lives (g-d bless ‘em) to simply acknowledge what we are going through and comfort us when we’re obviously going a touch off edge. If they instead try to reason it out or throw it back at us or question our instability, not only is it futile, it’s just going to make us feel more lost and inevitably disconnected to them. No, we don’t need others to completely understand, it’s not explainable, it’s just enough that they accept and be with it – like we have to. Easier said than done but if they can make the leap straight to simple compassion and love, oft times it’ll assist in keeping the pregnant mamma more grounded from the get-go.

Sometimes we’re just simply releasing the build-up – whether it be via screaming, fighting, laughing, crying. And that’s the thing about it, really those emotions feel like they are all pretty much the same thing. Similar to a kid who falls down and cries and then starts laughing hysterically – we don’t question their sanity, they’re just moving through their feelings, unhindered; uninterested in bottling them up inside (while we have no room left inside to bottle anything up!).

So I try to consider it part therapy, part accepted ridiculousness, that I now find myself in tears over typically unsentimental things; television shows like Dancing with the Stars for example. Or becoming immersed in irrational fights, over things I could care less about; or things I suddenly give much greater meaning to; or ways in which I can’t explain my perspective and needs properly; or even talking in baby talk because I have an overwhelming desire for everything to be nice and calm and good, and yeah, maybe I feel like I need to be coddled a bit like a baby.

If I wasn’t pregnant, if I wasn’t experiencing it for myself, I might consider myself koo-koo too. But I do have a hope that, as the influx of hormones deplete, and my body and mind reverts back to some semblance of my former (though drastically new) self, that I can find a sense of sanity again. Okay, maybe I wasn’t completely sane to begin with but…. When you are pregnant, it’s important to allow yourself to live these feelings, not get down on or judge yourself, while if at all possible keeping people around you who at least can enjoy the humor factor while not making you feel like a total nut-case. (Yes, this is a subversive, loving message to my patiently and devotedly evolving guy xoxo…).

Annoying Side-Effects of Pregnancy: Heartburn

The annoying side-effects of pregnancy could easily be a many-parter. Perhaps I’ll eventually do a comedic top ten or twenty or…. The only way I can avoid getting too down about it is to find solutions; and the solutions are not always pretty. In this case though, I have found relatively simple solutions to the annoying problem of heartburn.

First off, I now realize that before becoming pregnant, I’d never had heartburn. And I also now have more compassion for those who get it on any regular basis. I don’t feel like researching the medical info on specifics, but logic and a minimal background in anatomy, physiology and human biology has lead me to assume this acts up in pregnant women because of added pressure on the organs. Heartburn is typically acid that, for whatever reason, gets pushed up from the stomach into the esophagus (more modernly referred to as acid reflux) – so it’s not actually something that has to do with the heart, you just feel it in that area. It can be caused by a defective or weak valve – but otherwise I’m not certain why some have a proclivity towards it while others do not. Some foods which are more acidic or foods that affect the valve can increase chances of this occurring. As well, positions we get into or clothing that adds pressure on the stomach can have negative effects.

So when this first started happening to me, most often it would occur while I was lying down. A few pillow adjustments helped (pregnant wahines can never have too many pillows); keeping the body at an incline. Tilting the bed by propping up the front end a few inches is helpful (though you may also want to then raise the legs some if you’re experiencing edema). And you want to avoid lying down right after eating, which is never a healthy thing to do anyway. Sometimes lying on one side would aggravate it more than the other – but I lost track of which side because it kept changing. After some time passed though, and da belly got bigga, simply adjusting my position was no longer was a guaranteed fix.

FDA Reported Tums Side Effects: blood calcium increase (a cause of kidney stones), hypersensitivity, vomiting, mental impairment, malaise, confusional state, dyspnoea, suffocation feeling, bronchitis, asthma, hyperglycaemia.

Get emergency medical help if you have any of these signs of an allergic reaction: hives; difficulty breathing; swelling of your face, lips, tongue, or throat. Less serious side effects may include: nausea or vomiting; decreased appetite; constipation; dry mouth or increased thirst; or urinating more than usual

I recall on the Pregtastic Podcast that some women mentioned chewing on Tums like it was candy. While reducing stomach acid surely helps, it’s not really what you want to do after eating food – considering you want those stomach acids to break the food down into bite-sized molecules that your body can access and churn into baby nutrition. And often the issue is that you are having a problem digesting the foods in the first place – which is, in holistic terms, considered a weakness in the digestive system. Plus, though that is when it’s most prevalent, my burning throat sensation wasn’t solely occurring after food consumption.

So I decided to find alternatives and make something like the very doctor approved Tums -with its added sucrose, talc, aspartame (found in the sugar-free variety), mineral oil, etc.- a last resort. Because really, how long are you going to take Tums – your whole pregnancy? That can’t be good! Can I sidebar here: there are studies which show antacids create food allergies. And though by now most people understand the calcium in Tums is not a complete or bioavailable form -especially since you need stomach acid to absorb calcium – some still believe it’s supplying them with needed calcium during pregnancy. You can read about a few of Tums’ calcium marketing myths at Katolyn Yardley Holistic Health and check out important facts about calcium -and a great breakdown of product vs. how much calcium is really absorbed- in the article: Is It Important What Form of Calcium You Take. Pregnant women shouldn’t pop Tums or drink their daily glass of milk and think they’re all good! And since acid reflux, muscle cramps, loss of mental functions, low back pain are but a few of the symptoms of calcium deficiency -and your baby will take every bit of calcium you can proffer- you may want to look into it further. Avoid antacids containing sodium bicarbonate as it can cause metabolic alkalosis and increase the potential fluid overload in fetus and mother. Also, avoid magnesium-containing antacids during the last trimester because it can interfere with uterine contractions during labor!!! Now just a little more on aspartame (though it deserves its own post…).

One of the breakdown components [of aspartame] is aspartic acid…[which] contributes to free radical damage in the brain and literally “excites” brain cells to death. Another is methanol or wood alcohol, described by Dr. H.J. Roberts as “a real poison”. The third breakdown component of aspartame is phenylalanine.

Phenylketonuria, or PKU, is a genetic disorder which prevents a person from metabolizing phenylalanine. …board-certified neurosurgeon, Dr. Russell Blaylock, related aspartame’s effects on women who are pregnant and carrying the gene for PKU. Asymptomatic and often unaware that they harbor any such gene which might affect their babies, they are nonetheless twice as likely to give birth to a child with brain damage if they consume aspartame. –Children of the New Earth (check out their site for a lot more info on pregnancy and aspartame consumption. At least if you are taking Tums, do not use the sugar-free variety!)

At this point the heartburn feeling is a constant issue, which turns into a burping issue; it’s always in my throat. And though I find it difficult to swallow pills while pregnant ’cause just the act of putting them near my throat makes me want to gag, I thought a few of the right pills might be worth it if they do the trick. Luckily one of my massage clients is the owner of a local health food store and he was in that day, so he helped me pick out some of his favorite digestive enzymes and acidophilus. After having heartburn as a daily occurrence, it was easy to notice the pills stopped it quickly and efficiently and it worked for three days straight. Unfortunately, on the forth day I got into an argument with my boyfriend and it came back for a spell, albeit the burning sensation was less potent, less often than it had been for the preceding few weeks, so I am very pleased with the results (and added stress to the following list).

Your E-Z handy dandy checklist to avoiding heartburn with pregnancy.

• No stress. If your boyfriend or husband, co-workers/employer, parents, friends, etc. are not supporting you during your pregnancy, or are even making things harder on you – make some space, find some alone time, meditate. Your job is to protect yourself and the baby. Stress has lots of negative effects. The stomach muscles often contract during stress or fear – as well heat rises – so do your best to keep it mellow.

• Recline at an angle. When I told my boyfriend there was a recliner on Craigslist for $40 and asked if he could please help me pick it up – he balked, “we don’t have the money for luxury items.” Luxury!?! I can no longer sit straight up in a regular chair and I don’t want to have to be in bed anytime I need to rest (which is a mattress on the floor in the summer-hot second story). Suffice to say we have little other furniture at this point as we just moved. There are a few other preggerz reasons (like the pubis symphosis) which would make a recliner so wonderful for me to have right now, and heartburn is certainly one of them. I still dream longingly for the recliner, which sold three days later.

• Eat Your Veggies. If you’re not getting enough, your belly and digestive system may not be happy. Compliment some cooked food with veggies. And though raw is nice and healthy, it’s often too cold (elementally) on the mommy-to-be tummy, so lightly steamed may better suffice. At least have your salads more mid-day, not at night, because your body must work a little bit harder to break the raw foods down.

• Consider how you may be deficient. Work with a nutritionist if need be – they can often find out where you are lacking. Consult your doctor if there are any concerns over contra-indications with pregnancy. In my case acidophilus (enteric coated) and digestive enzymes seem to help (I take them twice a day). Probiotic formulas might be a supportive supplement. Also, your body may be running acidic (which depletes your bones of calcium) so you may want to find out (try some PH test strips) and consider things that could balance out a more acidic body – even a quality blend of calcium can do the trick.

• Avoid large meals. Though the enzymes should help you digest your food better – you are all squashed up in there and there’s no room. Eating a small amount every 2-3 hours should satiate, help you deal with any blood sugar issues (as long as you’re not eating junk), and allow you to more easily process. And don’t eat too late; though if you have a queasy tummy you’ll surely need to nibble on some bread or crackers.

• Pay special attention to foods that may make it act up. Foods that don’t make the situation any better for me: beans, too much dairy/milk, fruit juice, spicy foods, onion, garlic, tomatoes. I’m sure there are more, but I’m still trying to figure it out.

• Tea and hot water. Though it’s hard to figure the safety of herbs, especially during the first trimester, I did see this tea online called Earth Mama Heartburn Tea. Otherwise, a lite Peppermint can calm a belly, or even just a cup of hot water can soothe the digestive tract. I’ve noticed I crave cold water more than ever, probably because I’m so hot all the time, but I also notice my belly sometimes doesn’t like it. At least, drink anything cold very slowly.

And remember, whatever you consume in terms of medicines, chemicals (which includes all artificial sweeteners), herbs and supplements – always research information from those who are telling you it’s safe, and those who are telling you it’s not safe. Once you read both sides, then decide what makes sense to you and if it is worth the risk? Hope this helps you find the most healthful solutions to your annoying pregnancy side-effects. Good luck!

*   *   *   *   *

(A cool post-published link to check: “Heartburn: Stomach Acid or No Stomach Acid“)

Help! Baby Stole My Brain Cells!

…as with anything, there are people who do not believe in the memory loss of pregnancy. These doubting Thomases say that the woman is simply not paying attention. -Placentia Brains, by Robin Elise Weiss

Having no co-ordination, being unreasonably emotional, and losing essential IQ points are -I can now report from experience- not always controllable and certainly not mythological side-effects of pregnancy. (Our male dominated world needs everything to be scientifically proven – and it reminds me of scientists saying women don’t actually bloat during PMS. We don’t need a man to tell us whether or not we bloat! We bloat!). I always knew I would give up a chunk-o-qi by having a child, but I never realized how stupid and unable to focus I would become. During this time when we’re struggling through so much, we don’t need the world to tell us we’re just not concentrating, we’re blaming things on our pregnancy, or that we’re imagining it!

The brains of pregnant women appear to shrink during late pregnancy, according to research which offers an explanation for cognitive problems some women complain of before and after giving birth. The doctors at the Royal Postgraduate Medical School in London found that it can take up to six months for the women’s brains to regain their full size. -The (London) Independent

As with many side-effects, most reports mention brain cell lose (so to speak) more towards the end of the third trimester. I will state right now – this has not been communicated to my body. My body jumped on board ASAP; within two months adding 25 pounds (we’re up to 40 already at month 6), releasing the ligaments by the fifth month (we’ll talk pubis symphosis hell later), had me bumping into walls within two weeks, and left me practically brain-dead from the get-go.

When the study was extended to healthy women, it was found that brain shrinkage appeared to be a normal feature of pregnancy. The investigators believe that the brain changes are more likely to be the result of changes in the volume of individual cells rather than in the quantity of brain cells, Dr Holdcroft told the magazine. In addition, the team found that the pituitary gland, which lies at the base of the brain, showed the opposite effect – increasing in size during pregnancy, when it is responsible for producing reproductive hormones – and then diminishing in size in the months after pregnancy. -The (London) Independent

I have to remind myself three or four times what I want to remember. For example: There are three things you need to bring with you today; don’t forget, three things; three things…. Because I can not recall the three things for that long of a time, I must keep that in the background, and then before leaving go through what three things they could have possibly been. Every prenatal appointment I’ve had, I planned on leaving the day before. Since it’s a 2 hours drive I’m glad my boyfriend caught it. I have driven the wrong way down a one-way street twice. And explaining to the judge why I parked in the wrong spot because I was pregnant didn’t go over very well – though she did reduce the fee by $25 … and thankfully I didn’t burst into tears in court. (This chick blogged about a few funny incidents and comments on her Mandeeland site and Dot.Moms has some useful tips on what to expect out of “pregnancy brain”.) I won’t even get into how much energy it takes to write and spell, as I generate at least two typos per sentence and my train of thought is just that, a train, leaving the station…wait for meeee!

There is a paranoia that occurs -perhaps more so for women whose dream in life wasn’t necessarily just to have kids, be mom and loving wife, etc.- that they will now be stupid for the rest of their lives…. It’s like getting injured, where you wonder if you will ever be the same again. All I can hope for is that my body, as quickly as it manifested the  changes necessaryto help create this creature, will revert me back to the way I was. Okay, sure, I will be distracted, have a new focus, be a new person, but at least give me enough brain cells to not be driving the wrong way down the friggin’ road! I’m assuming such activity antithetical to the survival of my offspring, and nature will (please, g-d!) balance it all out accordingly. ‘Til then, I’ll try to keep it simple.

Pregtastic is Fantastic

Okay, I may not have the cheery sweet disposition of other pregnant women who dare deem pregnancy “pregtastic” – especially during the first three months of nausea, exhaustion, and emotional turmoil. In fact, I might say listening to the PregTASTIC Podast during that period may have been one of the few fantastic things that has helped keep me focused, relaxed and reasonably sane.

As someone who likes to know a little about everything, somehow I had successfully avoided knowing just about everything in regards to having children and being pregnant. This was going to take a serious crash-course.

Being a lover of podcasts -and not able to focus on reading while being icky-ill (not to mention not wanted to buy a big collection of baby books)- I noticed iTunes had a healthy array of podcasts for the mommy-to-be. And though I downloaded many, Pregtastic is of the few that spoke to me, answered my questions, gave a variety of perspectives, and introduced me to an abundance of aspects to pregnancy and birth without scaring me or leaving me without any solutions. They start with an open dialog with some pregnant guests, their ups and downs for the week, and then each episode usually features a guest who is the “expert” on the topic at hand, whether it be water birth, doulas, breastfeeding, hypnobirth, midwives, postpartum depression, baby gear and so much more!

If you are pregnant and like to take your ipod on car rides or exercise jaunts, you shouldn’t go without it. I recommend this to any future mom who finds some comfort and value in being knowledgable and informed.

The Best Baby Carrier

When you go 0 to 60 -in terms of baby knowledge- in nine months, it’s best to get help from some friends. Even friends you don’t know, who have the time to write reviews of every dang baby product out there (god bless ‘em!).

So when it came to baby carriers, I really needed help. You absolutely don’t want to get the wrong one – for you or for your baby. Especially with my back injury issues, carrying anything for more than a few minutes (even a light lil’ kiddle) could easily become pain-inducing.

When I asked my friend with two baby wahines for his input, he wrote:

I think that the Ergo Baby Carrier is going to be the ticket for you and your back. I love ours!

I started snooping online at everything out there, but most carriers seemed to hold the baby strangely; either seeming awkward for the baby or potentially for my back. The Bjorn line looked like a popular choice, and it was one I could find all over Craigslist, used, for a reasonable $15-25. Like many though, it looked like it had a strange crotch-oriented positioning for the baby, so I decided to check if there were any comparisons from my unknown mommy friends online. Actually, one review went into much detail about the matter and gave me the answers I needed.

…The Baby Bjorn straps place all the baby’s weight on your upper back and shoulders. As any hiker knows, it is much better to carry extra weight on your hips and that is why any decent backpack has a hip belt. The New Generation Ergo Baby Carrier has a hip belt and it makes a huge difference – much more comfortable for you!…

Seems the Bjorn worked for her ’til her baby was about 16 lbs, and after that the upper back strain became too much. ERGO must stand for ergonomic design, a vitally important aspect. As their publicity claims:

The ERGO Baby Carrier’s ergonomic design supports a correct sitting position for the baby’s hip, pelvis and spine growth. It disperses most of the baby’s weight between the hips and thighs. The ERGO also balances the baby’s weight to parents’ hips and shoulders, and alleviates physical stress for the parent. It can be worn on the front, back or hip position.

Though some contend the ERGO is too large at first, ERGO does make infant inserts which should allow you to be hands-free from the get-go. Nice. And the attached sleeping hood supports the sleeping baby’s head and doubles as a useful nursing cover-up. Since you can throw in your cash and keys in the zipper pouch, what more do you need?

Sure, you have to try them out for yourself (I’ll certainly insert my conclusion once I get my own!). But so far, my back and unborn think the ERGO sounds sooo good. And as icing on the cake, ERGO is locally owned; based in Maui. Though the line is produced in China they claim to diligently observe Fair Trade Practices and make certain workers are paid well and treated with respect. Top off the icing with even more icing…they’ve got a new organic line!

Click on the convenient ERGO link on the sidebar and order yours direct! Local Big Island residents can check them out at the organic baby store Moonsprout (right now still located at 142N Kinoole St. but will be moving to Kilauea -next door to Bears Coffee Shop- within the month! Call 808/935-7523 for more info)

Making Water Babies

The last few weeks, as my belly has gotten bigger, I’ve received comments by people suggesting I’m going to need to stop getting in the water. Sure, I can’t ride my potato chip short board any more. As a matter of fact, when I look at it now I see it from the eyes of many of the larger-sized local boys who would sink it. My 5′10″ is small, and sheesh really narrow, and sooo thin! So, besides occasionally borrowing, I’ve been riding a bodyboard until I can acquire a little bit larger stick to keep me afloat. And though it’s more comfortable in some respects (the leg/hip workout being quite gratifying for someone experiencing growing pangs), laying on on my belly is harsh (you adapt to keep pressure on the ribs instead but still). I’m hoping a bodyboard company will extend itself to inventing a bodyboard design for pregnant women, which, of course, I will gladly test out. Just carve out a spot where my now big-ass pooch can hang comfortably (not too much to ask for?).

Back to the comments…. They gave me serious concern, even though I personally know and have seen pictures of many women surfing pregnant (some all the way to term); mostly longboarding or on funboards. And though my instincts seem to adequately keep me in line, this is my first pregnancy so I decided to check in with the experts on my last prenatal visit, to make certain I’m not potentially harming the lil’ kiddle. And what I was told, “If you are able to, you can surf until the very end. The baby is really very protected at this point.” Now, I didn’t tell her I prefer surfing a bit bigger waves (though summer is often small), I’m limiting myself to head-high or less now.

Frankly, my main worry isn’t what I might do surfing, but what others might do to me. Though I’ve hurt myself taking chances -a concussion here and reef slashing there- the worst injuries (including a back broken in three places) have all occurred by other guys in the water. You know, where they think they’re going to make a drop, where they think they’re able to bust a move, where they eat it while magnetically heading straight for you. With just myself in the water, I feel safe, but besides being more cautious in general, surely I will have to keep a better eye on the guys. As a matter of fact, it seems my motherly instincts are already kicking in. For example, there’s this one goof at a local break here, who likes taking off in front of people in precarious spots, then cutting back into you, and making turns straight for you while you are paddling back out. There’s probably one like him at every spot: less soul more soulless. The guy who surfs to show off but in the end he’s just annoying everyone around him. Well, needless to say, during one recent incident inches from my face, I shoved him off his board, grabbed his clownish fro, yanked on it and -though I’d told him before- demanded he stay away from me. He started bawling. Whoa, that instinct is intense!

I also recently learned the chance for miscarriage is more serious in the first trimester and that, in actuality, that’s the time you need to be most careful. Thing is, for the large percentage of pregnant (slightly obsessive) surfer girls, all you are thinking is ‘I’m going to surf as much as I can while I can still lay flat on this thing!’ So, if you naïvely (as I did) made it past that stage, and can avoid collisions with water donkeys, play it safe and you’ll likely be fine surfing (bodyboarding, body surfing, swimming) even into your third trimester*. Now, popping an extra 25 pounds up may be a little more difficult (I’ve already gained that and am only half way there) – but it’s a great way to stay strong, keep in shape, and be physically prepared to pop that lil’ grom out when the time comes.

*This is not medical advice. Always check in with your doctor to see what is right for you.

(Originally written for The Surfing Village. For more info on moms surfing, check out the Surfing Mums web site.)

***7/22 update: seems the belly size increased overnight. Two dayz ago when I tried to bodyboard had to immediately lock it into wave at an angle and lay more on my side. Though I am obsessed with the wonderful fin workout (luv my Kicks), will certainly need that bodyboard with the belly cut out or just bodysurf. At the same time though, my arm muscles are such that I can finally push my new body up while surfing, so…ultimately I’d rather be surfing (just need to be able to update boards -and surf clothes- as the we grow. …will keep ya posted.***

Body Parts Gone Nai-Nai

There are an endless list of weird bodily changes that occur when a creature starts growing in your belly. One of these things is that your limbs fall asleep. I imagine the baby is needing all the blood and energy you can offer up – and as a mom-to-be of course you don’t mind sharing everything you can. Still, you can reserve the option to complain a little bit; to ponder the ridiculous variety of physical pregnancy anomalies. The night before last for example, I experienced something no one should experience, except perhaps when they are very old or ailing…perhaps. My arms, my feet, my legs…have all fallen asleep. And they’re not just tingly kine, but the kind where your body part feels like a rock, dead, no longer connected. But last night, my ear fell asleep. My ear!?! What the f$#& is that about?! No wonder you feel brain dead when you are pregnant – the lack of flow of anything beyond your torso is so limited. And I’m only a little over four months! We’ll just have to see how extreme it gets.

update: now the bottom of my feet -and I mean the bottom half inch- keep going numb. Like you are standing bare-foot in an electrified puddle of water. Yes, every pregnant momma-to-be deserves way more foot massages than she is getting…..